How to Celebrate a Birthday

1. With food. Everyone loves food, and getting to eat your favorites is a great way to spend a birthday.
2. With friends. Fun times are always available when friends get together.
3. With a party. It doesn't matter what size the party is, so long as it fulfills its purpose.
4. With gifts. Everyone enjoys getting something on their birthday, and a gift needn't be an object, just some thing or action that will bring happiness to the recipient.
5. With a good book. Because books make every birthday better.
6. With family. Those you love bring joy to every birthday, whether they are near or far away.
7. By making something. Crafts and projects can be quite exciting, and just the right challenge for a birthday.
8. By resting. Sometimes a good nap is all you want for your birthday.
9. By getting a haircut. A new hairdo can bring a smile to the now-a-year-older you.
10. By serving others. When you help others, you give a wonderful gift.

Sophie

The darkness could not hide her feral grin.
Stumbling back over the treacherous forest litter, the boy couldn't disguise the horror he felt at what his best friend had become.
"What's the matter, Bobby?" The girl crooned, her head tilting sideways like a curious bird even as fur sprouted from her face. "I thought you liked monsters."
"So- Sophie," Bobby could barely get her name out, let alone beg her forgiveness. This had been his idea, after all.
His idea, and now his fault.
"Sophie, Sophie." Her name sounded so menacing as Sophie's teeth lengthened into fangs. "That's not really a good name for a monster, now is it?"
"You're not a monster." Bobby shook his head in denial, though the guilt in his gut mocked his lie. He tripped on something and hit the ground.
Sophie laughed, the sound a discordant blend of bitter and gleeful. "Aren't I? Isn't that what we were trying to do with that stuffy old book; summon monsters?" She spread out her arms, and a glint of the full moon's light shone on her new claws. "Congratulations, Bobby. It worked."
"It wasn't supposed to!" There was a whine in his voice, one that made Sophie's now yellow eyes gleam hungrily. "And it didn't say anything about it possessing one of us!"
"Who would have attempted the ritual if it had?" She asked, voice roughening into something more guttural. "Leave enough mystery to such things, and soon the cats will come. And you know what curiosity does to such creatures." There was hunger evident in her voice now.
Bobby stared at the creature that looked less and less like his friend with each passing moment. Was Sophie even still in there? (Oh, Bobby hoped not. Hoped his friend wasn't trapped with that monster, unable to do anything but watch it control and steadily transform her body.)
"Sophie never could say no to one of you little adventures. Her heart was so sweet with its love for you." The monster bared its teeth in a farce of a smile as it stepped forward, testing Sophie's legs. "I wonder, how will yours taste on her lips?"
The monster lunged, and Bobby's scream sounded through the forest before abruptly dying.

To Get a Cat Tree

1. So your kitty has someplace they can look haughtily down at the dog from.
2. Because maybe then they won't use the couch as a scratching post.
3. Because it makes a better agility course then weaving between your legs while you stand at the stove.
4. Its the best place to nap when the afternoon sun hits it.
5. It gives your cat somewhere to gather their toys at.
6. Because your cat isn't allowed outside to climb real trees.
7. It is an excellent place to give your cat treats. Lots and lots of treats.
8. It is a safe place to hide from children.
9. It makes a good launch pad to leap onto unexpecting shoulders.
10. So the cat will (hopefully) stop stealing your chair.

Plan B

The night was dark, the wind was howling, and the little monster was lost.
It could have been worse, she supposed as the little monster stopped to rest on an old stump. At least the sun wasn't up yet, because than all of the humans would be out and about. That would lead to screams, and shouts, and gathering of pitchforks.
The little monster was not a fan of pitchforks.
But what could she do to get home? The little monster didn't even know where home was, or where she was. That's the problem with living in an alternate dimension; the pathways to and from it were constantly shifting about. And just because you were let out in one place was no guarantee that you could get back in from there.
She wasn't supposed to go near the pathways, as a hundred and seven was not yet old enough to handle an adventure in the human world.
But she'd always been a curious monster, and now that curiosity had gotten her lost.
Left alone sitting on a stump.
Well, there wasn't anything else to do but try Plan B.
Every monster learned different plans in case they got stuck in the human world for a while, though the little monster had never used any of them.
Still, she stood up off her stump and quickly headed off, hoping she'd be able to perform Plan B before morning's first light.
About an hour and a half before dawn, the little monster found what she'd been looking for: a human village.
Selecting the right house was tricky, as the little monster didn't have the time to be picky. But she found one with an open window she could fit though, and it even led right to a small room with a bed!
Ignoring the snuffling sounds of the small creature in the bed was hard, as the little monster had never seen a human before. Were they all so small and chubby checked?
Stepping carefully to avoid waking the small human, the little monster slipped underneath the bed with the ease of familiarity.
For being beneath a bed was one of the most comforting places a monster could be, even when the bed belonged to a small snuffling human.
Now to wait in the relative safety she'd found until either another monster could find her, or she could figure out a way to get home.
It shouldn't take too long, right?

Monsters with Good Dental Hygiene

1. Wererats. After all, if they don't care for their teeth, they won't be able to close their jaws.
2. Vampires. No one wants the remains of last night's blood still coating their fangs to taint their next meal.
3. Dragons. A knight's armor can be so difficult to pick from between one's teeth.
4. The monster under the bed. Because bad breath will keep the kid awake, which means less opportunities to startle them awake.
5. Sirens. No sailor, after being lured in, will stick around a siren with kelp stuck to her tooth.
6. Unicorns. Yellowed teeth kind of ruins the whole image of elegance.
7. Ghosts. Why else would so many bathrooms be haunted?
8. Shapeshifters. Because if you can change your shape at will, why not make sure your teeth are great?
9. Zombies. Little thought may be put into their appearance, but a zombie's teeth must be well cared for in order to get through skulls to the tasty brains waiting within.
10. Fairies. Some say they use fairy dust in order to achieve such a sparkle, but that's just a horrid rumor spread by those who are jealous of a fairy's naturally shiny teeth.

Sometimes

Sometimes life offers you lemons, when all you wanted was a lime.
Sometimes your heart is aching, but everything seems fine.
Sometimes the words come easily, but somehow fail to rhyme.
And sometimes all you want is to sleep, but can't seem to find the time.

For Friends

1. They make you laugh.
2. They give you a reason to eat lots of junk food while watching movies.
3. They can cheer you up when you're feeling down.
4. They can suggest new books for you to read.
5. They'll go on adventures with you.
6. They give you someone to talk to.
7. They can care for your pet if you have to suddenly leave town.
8. They can taste test your latest cookie recipe.
9. They can help you build a bookshelf.
10. They can offer you a couch to crash on.

The Warrior

There once was a warrior, the strongest in the land. Each day he would go out with his sword, find some troublesome spot within the kingdom, and solve the situation in the only way he knew how.
Many admired his skill with the sword.
Others feared where such skill might one day lead him.
The day came when word of a dragon in the kingdom reached the warrior. According to the rumor, a dragon had taken residence atop the royal tower wherein the king's eldest (and most beautiful) daughter spent her days deep in reflection.
Not wishing the princess to be harmed by such a dangerous beast, the warrior journeyed to the tower with sword in hand.
He met several singed knights on the way, each warning him of the dragon's might and how it refused to abandon its perch atop the tower. A few also mentioned how the dragon would not attack until provoked, and so the warrior thought deeply on how to utilize the information.
Upon reaching the tower, the warrior climbed the outer stairway until he reached the observation deck; where the dragon was curled around the tower in supposed slumber.
There was no sign of the princess, and the warrior hoped he was not too late.
The battle with the dragon did not take long, for though the beast was powerful, it seemed incapable of any deadly blows.
Perhaps it was sick? It did not matter. The warrior merely took the dragon's weakness as motivation not to falter as the knights had.
He would not flee from a singeing, if it meant rescuing the princess.
And so the moment came when the warrior gained the advantage, and plunged his sword deep in the dragon's heart.
At the moment, the dragon shuddered.
But death thralls did not follow. Instead, the dragon's shudders caused its form to blur, and suddenly it was the princess  who was before the warrior, his sword thrust through her chest.
The princess's dying breaths painted a picture of mage-craft gone wrong,  being stuck in a shifted form, and barely controlling the wild instincts of of her new form.
The was no condemning the warrior for his killing blow, though his heart ached at having struck down an innocent.
The princess died.
The royal family, not wishing to tarnish the people's memory of their daughter by revealing her dabbles in forbidden mage-craft, spread a tale of a hero who managed to drive off the dragon, but not before one of its sharp claws (so much like swords in their sharpness) pierced the princess's heart.
And the warrior?
He went to his home, hung his sword above the mantle, and never again took it up.