To Shop Online

1. It means you don't have to plan a trip to the store.
2. Sometimes you can find items at a discounted price.
3. You won't have to wander around the store and wonder if people are judging you for your choice of cereal.
4. Free shipping.
5. Because there are a lot of things online that you can't find in a physical store.
6. It'll give you plenty of time to overthink your potential purchase.
7. You won't have to look anyone in the eye (at least not until your stuff gets delivered).
8. The shipping time will give you a chance to get excited about what package will arrive first.
9. You won't have to drive anywhere.
10. It gives you a chance to go shopping with your goldfish.

The Circle

In the middle of a meadow deep in the forest, a circle of brown mushrooms grow.
They had grown there for as long as anyone could remember, and it was well known that anyone who stepped foot within the circle would be stolen away by the fair folk.
Despite this knowledge, foolish children would often dare each other to see who was willing to get closest to the circle.
They thought it a great show of their bravery.
But it was a fool's game.
Today, little Jimmy got too close to the circle. Right up to the edge, where he turned to grin at the other children, and tripped over an odd stone. In catching himself, Jimmy didn't realize that one foot was now within the circle.
Young Sandra noticed, but hoped that if she didn't draw attention to it, that nothing would happen to Jimmy.
And so Jimmy rejoined the other children, victorious in their foolish game.
When sunset came, the children all went to their own homes.
But while she ate dinner, Sandra couldn't stop thinking about Jimmy stepping into the mushroom circle.
And so after her parents fell asleep, Sandra snuck out of her house to go check on Jimmy.
Jimmy's family lived in the house next to Sandra's, and so she didn't feel too guilty about sneaking out. She knew which window led to Jimmy's room, and seeing that his shutters were open to let in the gentle night breeze, she crept toward it as quietly as a seven-year-old could.
Peeking into Jimmy's room, she relaxed when she saw him peacefully asleep in his bed.
A cloud drifted over the moon, and in the sudden darkening, Sandra noticed twin glints of light above Jimmy.
Twin glints that the moonlight had perfectly masked.
The glints of light shifted from Jimmy toward his window, and Sandra realized that they were eyes.
Eyes that now saw her.
In a panicked stumble that should have woken someone with its racket, Sandra raced back to her home, to her window, and to the now-not-so-safe comforts of her bed.
There, she shivered beneath the covers, trying to will the image of those eyes out of her mind.

When morning came, two houses echoed with the anguished wailing of parents whose children had vanished with the night.

Sides for Bacon

1. Macaroni and cheese.
2. Burgers.
3. Salad.
4. Maple bar doughnuts.
5. Alfredo.
6. Soup.
7. Grilled cheese.
8. Asparagus.
9. Casseroles.
10. Pizza.

Herding Cats

Herding cats is easy. All you really need to do is offer them something they love, and then spend fifteen minutes chasing them around the house until they decide to go get it.
Now herding dragons is a different story. You could offer them something shiny for their hoard, or the hair of the fair princess, or even the princess herself.
They might even take them. But that doesn't mean that they'll go where you want them to go.
And that route of chasing them for fifteen minutes?
They'll have roasted you before minute two.

Cats are Lucky

1. They can take naps whenever they want.
2. They have the ability to make people pay attention to them.
3. When they decide to ignore a person, that person knows it.
4. They can make anything into an amusing toy.
5. They know how to both find and catch any annoying fly.
6. Whenever there is food, they know how to get it.
7. They are adorable, and know how to weaponize it.
8. They have enough energy to stay up all night.
9. When it is cold, they can steal all the warmth.
10. They are masters at hiding in plain sight.

Haunters of the House

I knew Larry and Ruth, the monsters from under my bed and in my closet. We actually got along pretty well, and whenever I lost something in my room they knew exactly where to find it.
Walter was the shadow that lurked down the hall. His tricks could be annoying, but I'd gained an excellent awareness of when something was behind me because of him.
Stephanie made the stairs creak at midnight, which helped remind me not to stay up any later.
Morgan was the doppelganger in my mirror, who actually gave the best advice on what to wear (granted, communicating was difficult, but we'd worked it out).
Derek was the troll who lived in the dryer. I was constantly negotiating with him for the release of my left socks.
I'd come to know and accept that all of these monsters lived in my house, and that they weren't going anywhere. I'd thought of moving, but had never seriously considered it until I met Steve.
Steve lives in the kitchen sink, and he hoards dirty dishes.
At first, he wouldn't let me wash any dish, so I started ordering takeout.
He didn't like that, and started stealing takeout containers from the trash (which made Marcus upset, and when Marcus is upset the whole house reeks of garbage).
Finally, I was able to strike a deal with Steve. He could pick one dish a week, and that dish could remain dirty for the entire week.
But after the week was done, that dish would be washed (or thrown out, depending on its state) and he could pick a dirty dish for the new week.
It worked out, and everyone was happy.
Though the single dirty dish did earn me odd looks from my friends whenever they came over.

For Hard Work

1. Because if you get it done right the first time, then you won't need to redo it.
2. It makes you feel good.
3. It can be both mentally and physically challenging.
4. It can give you ideas for new projects.
5. It can make you stronger.
6. A good day's work can help you sleep well.
7. It gives you a reason to leave the house.
8. You can learn new things.
9. The work can be rewarding for both you and others.
10. Because not all work can be easy.

The Experiment

The routine was simple: heat, turn, tap, repeat.
There seemed to be no point, no real reason for the effort, until the day something inside of one of the eggs tapped back.
I didn't know what to do when I heard that tapping. There was no one I could call for guidance, for all communication into or out of the lab was prohibited.
A dumb rule for a lab that usually only had two people maintaining the experiments at any given time.
At least, we usually had two people here, but Jeff had left a half-hour ago because of a lingering tomach bug.
So I was alone with no chance of support until the next shift came in two hours from now.
Would I even still be here in two hours, or would whatever is tapping inside the egg have eaten me by then?
I didn't even know what was supposed to be in the egg. It was part of a clutch they had found in some classified location, a location that had apparently been cold enough that the eggs had arrived at the lab frozen within chunks of ice.
Tap tap tap.
Wait, is that a crack?
It is.
I'm pretty sure this is the time to panic.
If I was actually a scientist, I'd probably be excited right now.
But no, silly little me just had to agree to some extra credit work to raise my grade in science.
It was supposed to be boring grunt work! That kind of stuff where they get someone of normal intelligence to do stuff as a "control", so that they can get all excited when the real subjects of the experiment prove to be vastly superior.
The crack was getting larger, and the tapping more insistent.
These were my final moments. I was going to die a pain death.
I just hoped the thing killed me before it tries eating me.
A sharp crack rang through the room, and eggshell fragments fell to unto the table.
Bright red eyes stared into me, and I knew I was a goner.
The red eyes blinked, and then in a movement to fast for my eyes to track, the thing had left its broken shell and attaches itself to my face.
"Ah!" I shouted, Reaching up to grab the thing even as I tensed in anticipation of further pain.
But other then pricks of pain where its claws were keeping it pinned to my face, the creature didn't seem to be attacking.
My fingers felt fur, of all things, covering the creature. And it seems to be purring.
"Well," I said, my voice shaking with an anxious laugh at how I wasn't dead yet. "If something is furry, digs its claws into your flesh, and purrs, then it must be some sort of cat."
The newly dubbed cat purred louder as I hesitantly pet it, hoping that by doing so, it might decide not to eat me in the tine it took for help to arrive.